whatever it takes*
Saturday, February 08, 2003
I’m planning for the day I sweep you off your feet
I'd never leave you alone
what could you possibly see in me?
You’re the threadwork to my seams
And I warned you please don’t play with me- random thought
ok so last night wasnt to bad. the house was friggen guam sized not to mention a previos castle. it still had some castle walls and pics of when it was which was cool. indoor pool also. but i slept most of the night in some room bc i couldnt take my family anymore, oh and i was tired. little did i know some fancy drink was like half filled with vodka and mangos and weird things like that, but it was actually really good. tho yea i slept. back to my family, once again i was the family joke and reject. i HATE inappropriate things said in front of me when im with my family and u dont say that in front of someone elses kids either. so SORRY mom but of course after they say it my moms on the floor laughing and everyone just stared at her. GOD, i really wanted to die. and of course the other family was discussted and pissed she said it in the first place but no one listens to me, unless theyre planning on maknig fun of the things i say afterwards. dammit. "mom shut ur mouth its inappropriate and i, as well as everyone else hear but our family, wont want it said" "omg melissa go away if u dont want to hear the FUNNIEST story in the world, u try to be so innocent, go help the poor" and of course who the fuck was right? i hate them so much sometimes. and they tell everyone everything i do and dont even ask if its ok. god forbid im comfortable with the things they say about me. "melissa doesnt want a job she just thinks she'll make money and then she'll give it all to charity"- exact mother fucking line. maybe if u fucking listened ud actually know what i wanted to do but no one does so therefore how the fuck would they know? thats not what i want to fucking do. and im not telling anyone because no one fucking supports anything i want to do, they just make fun of it till i change my mind. so everytime i have to go somewhere with them i end up hating them which is why i babysit so much. see it all makes sense. next, showcase was canceled so i didnt miss much. alternative took my spot for the night which is understandable. if it snows tomorrow ill be pissed. i think im going to stefs today but i dont know. i have to see later. i vowed i will not ever set foot on the boat (bigger one) unless im a) allowed to stay on it alone and b) can have boys sleep over too...im getting this down in fucking writing, bc they said yes but once summer comes along theyll "forget" and therefore i shall sink it. little boat i shottied. im gunna prove i know how to drive it a few times and im set. mom woke me up at friggen 9 o'clock to announce were having eggs, the one meal i HATE. let me rephrase: "one of the MANY meals of which SHE makes that i hate" in reality i love eggs but the watery hardly cooked freaky texture of hers get to me. and of course somethings always ify about the bacon and practically frozen ketchup on burning hot eggs. that freaks me out also. maybe im just picky, im really not thought i eat everything, just like 2 things she "makes". by "makes" i mean, puts restaurant food in the microwave and makes that or boils water to put in pasta and then loads it with sauce from the store. i mean no one can really mess up those two things. putting all this aside as well as a few other issus, theyre not so bad. -melissa
Friday, February 07, 2003
why am i always so attracted to drama?
heyla. im leaving soon to go to dinner at peoples house in guam why why why, i want to go to the showcase soo bad its not fair. WHY ME? hah just kidding. today was so fun. me carly liz amanda james and kaayle made plans to go to chriass and didnt tell him and then we did and he was all against doing something on a SNOW day, so me and amanda just showed up at his house anyway. then james came and then carly and liz. we made a slide out of the 3 steps to get to chriass door adn chris styed inside. we slid down that but then realized how gay it was and chucked snowballs at eachother and the house. we saw barker come home and that was good. then chrias came outside. kaaayle was a no show. thanks kyle. danielle couldnt come either. or alissa. we got 2 pies and devoured pizza and lemolade teehee. PAH. james and chrias shoveled the driveway and me carly amanda and liz got to hang out..aloooone. we had fun. it seemed like guam years we got to hang out. i love you guys. we pigged out and when chris came in we hid all the food haha. amanda read the newspaper, so we called her our dad. liz was the mom cuz shes liz and carly was the little annoying 4 year old since she kept saying YAAAAY but we all know i do it the best and i was um the dog lol. thanks guys. all we did all day was talk like sybie and the person who calls carlys hosue and goes "hi is carly der" haha. everytime carly said something gay we would just spit or swallow to her..so note that to urselfs. if u ever need a comeback for one of carlys "comebacks" use that. haha. and the comeback for liz was "fuck u liz" everytime. even wen she said normal funny things ahah but u have to say it right or its not funny. we sang chorus songs all stupid-like and were just so gay all day. reminced on things like stefs birthday party wen me and carly just sat there screaming vagina and ejaculation and thought it was so funny. it still is for some reason. and the summer going into 9th grade when me and amanda hung out every single day. wowzers. we found actualy grass from some PLACE today. we needed money for pizza so we walked to lizs for her to get money and she took a while and she said she was um "getting on socks" but we all knew wat she was WEEELY doing. haha. "liz went in for a quickie" haha i love u liz. LOL james came in the house all pooped from being in the snow and like walked into the wall, well his funny bone did anyway. chrias took his raazor scooter out in the snow and fell over on it. well actually its gregs but oh well. carly picked the snow off barkers dads car and he was telling her how that could scratch it and shes like "oh ok sorry" but still kept doing it. mary looked like a nome, according to liz. HAHA carly had an idea, and the first thing james says is "does it have to do with food?" and it did and she wanted to go buy the coloring for snow cones and put it all over the yard on the snow and eat it all. fatass haha. we listened to vice city cds and me and amanda got headaches. liz frenchbraided our hair and mine came out all shitty but it looks cool now. since i took it out. gayface called and everyones like "whose on the fone" and chrias told us and everyone BUT me goes "EEW" in like unicine. me carly liz and amanda ate oreos and milk and just made fun of eachother and took 100 pics and amandas like "who wants milk" and im like "me" and liz is liek "me" and carly starts singing randomly "me me me me me me me me me" it was great. YAAY. its over! wow we are so gay. we saw the 6th graders. gay gay gay. i cant wait till next year. shit. amanda says when u walk backwards its like ur being rewound or something..um freak jk. all in all it was a fun day, at the bradleys. i love you guys <3 <3
and now this all comes crashing down.
A broken heart is murder for the soul,
Its torn for all to see.
And im bleeding out my pain.
and i've seen
you don't need the seeds
when the dirt goes in deep
something from a poem i put together last night. hey i was bored. i know it sucks. WOOT no fucking school man. and loads of sneeeew. wat to do..wat to do with the body. hmm. lets see..im gunna make this the best flippin snow day ever. really tho..i want to have a GOOD one. not one of the little "oh lets have a sucky snow ball fight" and then we like run away from people. like go to someones house and call them and be outside there house and pelt them wiht snowballs. and me carly liz and amanda should go do something like that..last time it snowed me and amanda tried to eat her whole yard of snow. we got to about 6 inches long and deep and got full. --someone needs to fall in a hole and die-- we would all live happier lives- yes....u are a fucking flamer. or they could just be nice for a change. but hey. ill update later i just got up kinda and i want to call people..peec yo
Thursday, February 06, 2003
a simple whisper from your voice and i fade away.
you wish for love, you push me away
your love me was everything i need, the air i breath-taar
*im going to be venting like this whole entry so u can x- out now*
"yo wut up its ___" "dont forget to bring in what u need, or u wont get credit..THAT WOULD SUCK"- haha ashley castros so funny on the annoucements. long day..ended real shitty. damnit im so not in the mood. i just want to help people and i fucking cant..how am i ever gunna do this. i really hope one day i get to do the only thing im good at. i want to keep saying how i feel and thats how im gunna be able to do this. i know its gunna be hard. today showed me, people just dont cooperate. i guess i thought this was much easier then it is. im not giving up. ever. u probablly dont know whats going on but 9th period sybie wasnt there and neither were some other teachers cuz they were at mr columbos funeral :( so everyone who didnt have a teacher went to the gym and i saw kids making fun of someone who never would do a fucking thing to anyone and just minds his own business and all the shit he goes through everyday he doesnt deserve. i really respect him..because hes really strong. half the people that get this commit suicide and hes dealt with some big losses, so lay the fuck off. like danielle said "the only reason they do this is because they dont have any self esteem and degrade people to make up for it" and their fucking insecurities. god. i just wanted to cry so bad and i tried to help him and now i regret not doing as much as i could have. i wish he read this so he knows there are some people in this school who do care about him. i do. actually i did cry but that doesnt matter. i guess since rhea and stuff this stuff gets to me. sometimes ill even get mad at her and i want to slap myself. but i know its ok, just i take her for granted at times..i do with everyone. i feel like such a bitch. i really do love everyone. i just hate so much things people do. and i just want to make them see its important to be who you are and stand up for everything you believe in. why dont people understand this? download rem- everybody hurts. its a good song. today i felt good about myself i wasnt bitchy or pretending not to notice someone who maybe i dont get along with and have had some fights with, but you know im over it. im not gunna go hold a grudge, im just not gunna go be their best friend but im gunna have to learn to deal with people, and respect them, and also the differences i have with them. it is ok to get mad but i really have thought about things that bother me and i want to accept them and stop running away from them and avoiding all im scared of. "u called me late last night in tears, u said u missed me after all these years. ive been waiting here so long, gotten over it since uve been gone..so sorry that u left me all alone..where have you been?"- reel big fish. that song just came into my house. let that be a lesson. dont give up on people. sometimes i feel like everything is over and would only get worse if i talked to them or tried to sort it all out. like today last night i was telling someone (awesome) some thoughts of mine and i felt like she didnt care. and like all the times we fight and stuff i just think of bad things. today i was scared to talk to her and wait for her at the stairs, but i did. and i would have really regretted it if i didnt. cuz like always it worked out. so yeah lots of things do work out for the better. its about faith. the smiths- asleep. i guess i learned a lot more about myself today. today i started crying in the car ride home from school because my mom actually told me she was proud of me and i knew she meant it this time. it wasnt "im proud u did that..but um u really should know better then even that and do this also" like i tried to help the kid and i told her and she does respect im not like her at times. i have a really really really good idea. wow..ill show u all when im done<3 if u read this...dont ask me about it. lol later
Wednesday, February 05, 2003
"your the warmth to my blankets"- me
hah that was quote to liz bc i had 5 seconds to think of a line in a poem. carly said "your the medicine to my disease" or something like that lol. american idol was on last night. that shows great. today in lunch we concluded the only fakeness about the show is simon definetly doesnt think of his own comebacks or insults half the time and half the people in tryouts are fake just to make the show funny. we also decided lunch this year kinda does kick. today i never saw kyle laugh as hard as he did..james cried as well. of course it had to be over something stupid i said..but of course i was kidding the whole time..um. yea well james (lmfao) got a pic of himself and his sisters friend edited it so he has a wig on and dressed as a bride and at first i really thought he dressed up or something so thats what made it even funnier. anyway so in lunch today im like "kyle were at jamess when he dressed up?" and theyre like "um what" and im like u know in the pic he sent us? and they started dying laughing and i sat there dumbfounded as to wat the hell was going on. new chizik names became "chiz whiz, easy chiz, jada chiz, and chizit" pah. speaking of pah, in chorus we have to like sing the word HAH! so me carly and liz made it into PAH. ok HELLO february, not to mention names or anything but HI head junkie definetly wants to be stef or something. today she wore shorts and a t-shirt. maybe she got her period or pissed herself. did u guys ever hear the rappers called criscross? they used to wear their pants backwards. i found it cool when james told us. rip mr columbo. seriously that guys is great. i love you. no sybie tomorrow :( isabel soy yo was on in spanish today i was so flippin happy. it brought back memories. DAMN IT and i remembered when joe did the impression it was fucking hilarious and he said hed do it the 5th of every month and i reminded him cuz it would be the 5th of every month. 9th period in math, but he forgot and so did i. pooey. i have to wait till next month now. gay. i felt bad for alex today. he came to my locker and he looked all green and told me he barfed in pool. luckily it wasnt in the pool. he'll tough it out though. jeff said he stayed home too. afterschool me and stef went to slices and "to our suprise" darren was there with carly. then who shows up..carlys arched nemisis, i love how i spell..but yea she walked in and carly shit a brick. so we "coded" the schene and that helped her release her anger in front of the other people wihtout them knowing wat the hell was going on. theature was fun today too though it has been for a while. me and carly "pretended" to be gay with our scence. though in real life she really does call me a golden god haha jk. god i have gay chorus songs stuck in my head..luck be a lady tonight actually. joe walsh stole the music. actual line in the medley "u can blow on his dice". doc thinks were all perverted and that turns him on. me and stef reminisced on our recent chem video and some good songs like "solid to a solid to a solid to a gas, sublimation-!" hah. matt randomly sees stef in the hall and goes "ur hot" uh smooth move golfpatty. i read an old fight i had with dr moose and it cracked me up. they all actually thought i liked fronk. wow fronk..why did we call him that? hmm. so me carly and liz are taking one for the team. i guess u could say that. tutoring was canceled. jonathan told me he voulenteered at a nursing home. i find that really sweet, yet not a jonathan thing to do. i dont know why its just jon in a room with a bunch of old people. but that was canceled for him since the people all have a virus and they had like lockdown or something hah. so jon walked out singing la la la virus la la virus, while theyre like dying in there. lol. jeff just asked wat i write in my journal? basically watever im thinking about. right now im thinking about my averages and how there pretty damn good. and also a few things i heard today that are still irritating me. like one story about a skinny"girl", obviously obsessed with the fact her stomach is skinny, actually said to my friends "does this shirt make me look fat? well i mean EVERYONE says im SOO skinny but i dont know.." and it was obvious she waited for them to be like "aw ur soo skinny hunz" and they just sat there haha. in gym we did a yoga tape called yoga for dummies. i swear u all should go buy those tapes and books that are like "blank for dummies" exact lines from the yoga tape "first thing to do is breathe. now to breath u need to exhale and inhale. u do these both through ur nose in yoga..it should sound like the ocean" and then she went into this whole rampage on "now that ur sitting lift up ur left leg and slide to the side. now balance on both legs and stay straight up..now u are off the ground on ur feet. this is called standing" dammit just say "stand the fuck up" hah yes i needed to share that with u all. my mom wouldnt let me go to jamess and he was gunna have me kyle and carly over again, like ol times but of course i couldnt go since i um needed to rest. and i seriously came home and sat on the computer and chatted. i would have done the same thing at jamess but ok mom. she said i needed to rest to tutor later also. cuz 6th grade math is definetly the most strenuous thing i can think of. watever im out..unit circles await!
Tuesday, February 04, 2003
you could lose yourself in your courage
when the time we have now ends
can you still feel the butterflies
can you still hear the last goodnights
i cant do a thing but wait <3
-for me this is heaven- jimmy eat world. i love it. and i also love the all american rejects..arent they the best? yes thought so. now tell dan jones that. hah. everyone came back from fla today but amanda didnt come to school. i just got to talk to her. seems like she had fun. i wish i could away alone, just for a weekend. wow i really wish that actually. id go to the beach, and sleep there at nights. senior year- road trip baby. danielle was back from dying today also. i was so excited. yea dan. english became that much better. ss average was a 90, thanks chiz..or the new name is now "mac n chiz" Haha. right anyway, chem lab was fun. i gave liz the extra marshies since she was irresponsible and forgot lol jk. oh how can i forgot. <3 doc was back <3 lol and we got new music!! jk im not a junkie. the square root of a junkie- me carly and liz. we just observe the junkies so were like half of them. anyway, procediing oklahoma in the spring concert will be the melody of guys and dolls. score. liz was happy. it brought back some deep memories to her of when she was a little kid and her mom would sing her the songs from the play. hah. taking back sunday, on uh sunday. so excited. for a minute i didnt think id be allowed to go since i reminded dan i liked the all american rejects. pah. sybie (in da club) told me i needed to go to extra help bc i told her i didnt understand a simple question. and i got mad and told her that wasnt a friggen reason to go to extra help and since were in class she should just answer it now. but no she wouldnt, so my beloved friend kyle explained it to me. then dan did afterschool, since it was tuesday and all which is get tutored day. tomorrow (wedensday) is tutor someone else day. and i tutor my moms friend whose in 6th grade in math. actually tomorrow will be the first day but i love this kid (drew) their old family friends and hes really funny. now im listening to coheed and cambira- devil in jersey city. i havent heard it in a while so yeah. my mom just took rhea for a junior prom dress. what else..oh so after school i hung out with carly and liz until dan came and then he did and they left. we didnt do much. we were with alex and amy most of the time. then dan left and me amy and alex went downstairs by all the art paintings on display by the girls locker room and we analyzed them all. some really suck. then i gave alex a ride home cuz god forbid he walks lol jk. i love alex. his new name today became charlie. because he really remindes us of charlie in the perks of being a wallflower. im gunna let him read it so he can understand who the hell were talking about. i want james to have people over tomorrow, regardless of its a school night. hi his parents wont be home till thursday and we definetly havent taken advantage of this enough yet lol. not like theres much to do. carly and i talked in the hall wiht doug today and then james came over probablly curious to see doug talking to us and not avoiding us after hearing the usual "yea doug" so we hung out w/ the cote bros between 6th and 7th. james said frankies friends seemed a lil interested in me and carly. score. hah. new song- days away- she knows my name. last night my toe exploded. i know u all know about the whole fungus deal. but ashley scared me saying i could have an ingrown toenail and it would go to my heart and then id die lol. so i cut the nail and tried to fish out the goodies and it started gushing blood for 10 mintues. i told jeff about it on the fone. but yea the fungus grew back in like a day hah. no its not gross fungus. carly and i decided on a play for our final assessment in theature. we chose like the only american play due to my enate skills in observancy. riight. dont look down- on my own. thats enough songs. i have to shit. but ill make stef proud and hold it. ive acutally really started giving thought in wat i want to do with my life. probablly because of jeff. he brings it up a lot which helps. i cant flippin wait till valentines day. jeffs friend started talking to me online. shes nice. micheal told alex in the car how to work his toy and he said in order to transform it u have to open its titties. i was embarressed by him. oh and i was SOO excited the people in theature that were in florida are back. hmm...k im gone-look at me im so desperatlly crying out for ur company. this doesnt happen everday please dont leave me here this way, i fell in love with u and i want u everyday, for i dont know wat to say, my heart is black and blue but id give it all to u- hard times- dynamite boy (good good song)
Monday, February 03, 2003
hey whats up? yesterday was great fun. it was just me carly chrias and alex. froey was a no show. anyway, alex treated us to a fine lunch/dinner at don ricardos. here we enjoyed the classic alex juice, nachos, quesidllas and i carly and chrias got chimichanga (con pollo). alex got the fajitas. i was gunna bust from all that food so i had to stop. alex decided to take us on the grand tour of the restuarant. here we explored: first the bathroom..caballanos or somehting like that means gentlemen. for the "alex" way to remember this, think caballo is horse..so thats men? riight. and dumans or something is ladies, cuz well thats the other one. i still say it should say muchachos y muchachas but watEV. then we went upstiars and theres only a ladies room up there..(how sexist). alex took us on the roof. it was cold but not for chrias..because "i have dad's blood!" lmao. we couldnt hop roof to the roof like i hoped cuz its hard to get all the way on top. i cant explain. we looked into the skylights down onto to the people and tried to get their attention by doing funny/sexual things but we had little sucess. chris flashed the people below us on the ground. aaanyway, then we walked to "the bean" but since it was sunday they were closed. we went to sweet sensations and permetly stood by the alarm that goes off when someone walks in just to keep making the sound. the lady then stared at me. it was funny. the giovans brought us all home. we had to all fit in the backseat with lindsey, carlys sister. carlys dad said "well its a good thing ur all skinny"..i guess he forgot carly was in the car. but thats no suprise. i mean once me and chrias got out, her mom though alex was already dropped off and said "so did he treat u" and he was still in the car haha. we joked about that today. it would have been funny if she said like "don ricardos BLOWS right?" haha jk don ricardos for lyf. (and one acts). so then there was wonderful school today. we worked in groups once again 1st period in english. danielle please dear god come back to school. now our group has become me jeff and the deaf/odd girl. so i guess the only problem with the group is her since danielle and jeff are really cool. no i feel bad i like her. haha. she just freaks us out thats all. gym was gay, since we started fitnes and its just girls cuz the guys have pool. haha. no more jashole :( now hasset. the ghetto weight room was locked so she sent me and ashley mattson on a mission to find "bob the key guy" with no instructions as to where this random guy could be. so we went to the janitors office and the door closed on my face. sadly, no bob. everytime i saw a janitor, id yell out bob and he wouldnt answer, probablly since its not his name. we got one guy who told us bob already unlocked the room so we went back. of course it was still locked. we tried to hang out with another gym class but mr harran finally caught us, but he really thought we were in the class. god im a jashole. nothing chem, or spanish (though it was the first day of the year i didnt look at the clock and didnt realize until the bell rang), chorus thank god fag fuck fiore wasnt there and it was another free all u can eat buffet at darrens locker again haha. then theature was great fun. justin estelle told me if im together with someone then i only have "half a boyfriend" and it got me thinking. he was chewing on katrinas hair piece and katrina yelled out "justin are you sucking on my clip" me alissa and carly (who else) found it quite funny. and if u dont get it, say it outloud a few times. i had thought she said something ELSE. everyone thinks were pretty perverted though we are. berbo. then ss. we found out chiziks friend who was on the bachorlette (greg) was dismissed due to cocaine found in his room or something. conclution: chiz is a dirtbag. lunch we talked more about jamess and carly and the DUMB things she did hah jk. mostly about james. and some other topics. like an explanation on g-strings for kyle and kyle says he wants to go to school with a thong over his pants. hmm...oh yes HAHA and jamess sisters friend that was at his party is an elementry school teacher and all the kids have weird names. one kids name is actually Xyz. yes the 3 last letter of the alphabet. his name sounds like Tsiz it cool. i thought it was cool anyway, the guys said it was gay and chris said it was like having ur name be the first 3 letters of the alphabet Abc. (pronounced: aabica) in math finally the best period of the day, we had a seatchange..i love seat changes but the best thing was we got to choose our own seats. it was great. sybie asked whose been in mathleetes and i proudly let her know i was a member. then she asked who performed in the tounrnament at the suffolk community college and i said i did and then all the boys commented on things i did there and how i also met jeff. afterschool i chilled with alissa liz chrias and carly and then alissa went to kickline, liz went home cuz it was her mom birthday (so no we didnt go to the last mathleetes meet) and chrias went home too. then me and carly found alex and mineo coming and hung out with them. then mineo saw dan and bennett rapidly walking home in the st and ran to catch up with him. we watched from the window it was funny. then i waited with "pabs" jk (alex) for a while and went home. now im queer. and now im not.
Sunday, February 02, 2003
wow hi sorry i didnt write since friday and its sunday. wowzers lots to update..me and jeff went to see final destination 2 at gay clearview BOYCOT CLEARVIEW, and u need id to see rated R movies so i breifly bitched out the guy until he told me if i wasnt gunna move hed come and move me. at least most of the people there went to south gay anyway. so we went and saw the recruit..well it was that or kangaroo jack so shut up. we had fun, the movie was ok. not that i watched much of it..pah. um right. then i kinda got in trouble for walking there and not calling but it was ok. my parents are obsessed with jeff. ok im listening to dashboard..its been a while. "im missin ur laugh, how did it break? and when did ur eyes begin to look fake? i hope ur as happy as ur pretending" god i remember putting that on my aol profile guam ago. it fit perfect and i cried when i wrote it. because i wanted so bad for the guy to know it was for him since it fit so perfect. id just stare in his eyes and hed look back and id just think of that quote..fuck. ok anyway right so then we went back to my house and hung out and it was great. then he left :( and i pigged out. hah. then saturday i went out to lunch with grandma. i havent seen her in guam years and usually when she asks to do something i give some lamo excuse of why i cant go. i just recently began feeling really bad for doing stuff like that since she wont be around forever..god i sound gay. anyway i got home and called james to find out when to go to his house for the big shabang and he was trippin' cuz he invited to many people and got in trouble so i helped him out and me kyle and carly went. carly came over first and we listened to music and talked and watnot. carly and liz went to jen hunters open house and i got the whole 411. then we went to jamess. let me just say..that was so fucking fun. i didnt even have to drink which made me proud of myself. i had like 2 sips of kyles one beer that he drank like half of. and me and him the whole time made fun of james and carly being drunk. carly was so flippin funny. james was a lil wasted too. i pretended to be drunk to see wat other people would say and as an excuse to tell people wat i really think of them. like this kid vinny is 14 and smokes hi hi hi empysema. sharons friends are cool. matt collins was there which was cool and brian butcher lol. james made a cd "gettin my mix on". im digging the whole "getting my ---- on" so now my away messege is getting my blog on. cuz im...cool? carly almost broke jamess toilet and i saw faces in the window, but so did sharon so i wasnt lying. this guy brian pretended to be the police when he came and it was great. i was pissed i missed the appearence of rob..rob the slob aka t-rex. HAHA i dont even no him but that was still great. days away is a really good band. ok what else...me and kyle played go fish and i drank iced tea. i was happy i got to meet frankie, jamess brother cuz i never met him and i know eveyrone else. james kept telling everyone i was his sister and matt and carly are cousins. after we left the party really got kicking. it was like hardcore open house till 5 in the morning, which is cool. james said it was like 10 things i hate about u, no exaggeration..hmm. lol. so we came home..carly was still drunk in the ride home. my parents dont care tho, i told my mom the truth before i went out so she could give me rides and not get the wrong idea if she saw people outside smoking and drinking and thinking it was me. and she was happy i told her. yea so in the car, my stepdad brought up that space shuttle thing which is really sad (r.i.p) and hes like "they just found a hand" and carly died laughing and couldnt stop the whole ride home. she was drunk online too, it was funny. so yea today me carly chrias and froey i believe are meeting alex at don ricardos. i cant wait. alex is the best. anyway, today is ground hog day and usually the worst day of the year for me. all the worst things of my life have happened on this day. i know im guna like jinx it now but yeah. its freaky. i rather not get into the things. ok im getting my blog off? hah later kids <3
